>> Sunday, July 10, 2011
As a child, I remember family members blindfolding me so I could learn how to navigate when I became blind. So concerns about my vision are always just under the surface.
My husband and I had been traveling almost every weekend … him on his motorcycle (a new one which must be ridden) and me driving (not new car but must be driven). Returning from our last trip, I was headed west on I-84 about an hour from home when I began to notice something flapping, like it was caught under the windshield wiper. Weird. How could something suddenly be under there?
It continued flapping as I headed north on I-82. It had been faint before, but became darker and more defined. Those jagged edges look like pinking shears. Gradually I saw the same jagged edges above the windshield wiper. It looked like a shark’s mouth quickly opening and closing.I’m losing my eyesight. I need to stop driving.
I pulled to the side of the freeway. My plan had been to exit the freeway and meet my husband in Hermiston for lunch. But now the
And so I prayed … at first more like begging. Please touch my eyes. As I sat there, not knowing what to do next, the intensity of the zigzag lines began to fade. Slowly the picture in my head of shark’s teeth biting began to shrink.
Then it was gone. Thank you, God.
By the time I could get turned around on the freeway (which involved driving over the river, getting on Highway 14, getting off Highway 14 and entering the freeway going south) my hands were no longer shaking. As I drove toward Hermiston, that’s when the nausea hit. I was so scared it made me sick to my stomach.
Lunch was a blur. I just wanted to be home. I went straight to the computer and my friend … Google. Typing in “jagged lines in vision”, I immediately had many choices. As I read, I understood that I was not the only one in the world that this had happened to.
“This visual aura may expand into a sickle – or C-shaped object with zigzag lines on the leading edge. As it moves, it may appear to grow. Auras are sometimes accompanied by a partial loss of vision and commonly last 10 to 30 minutes.”
It’s a type of migraine … and causes nausea.
My issue with all of this is my reaction. If I believe that God cares for me (which I do) and I believe that He is working all things together for my good (which I do), then why did I get so upset? And so I’ve pondered … do I really believe? If so, where was my faith?
I’m still pondering.
“And the Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness. For example, we don’t know what God wants us to pray for. But the Holy Spirit prays for us with groanings that cannot be expressed in words. And the Father who knows all hearts knows what the Spirit is saying, for the Spirit pleads for us believers in harmony with God’s own will. And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.” Romans 8:26-28 (NLT)