I Am Thankful

>> Saturday, July 30, 2011

For the wife who says, “It’s hot dogs tonight” because she is home with me and not out with someone else


For the husband who is on the sofa being a couch potato, because he is home with me and not out at the bars.

For the teenager who is complaining about doing dishes, because it means she is at home and not on the streets.


For the taxes I pay, because it means I am employed.

For the mess to clean after a party, because it means I have been surrounded by friends.

For the clothes that fit a little too snug, because it means I have enough to eat.

For my shadow that watches me work, because it means I am out in the sunshine.

For a lawn that needs mowing, windows that need cleaning and gutters that need fixing, because it means I have a home.

For all the complaining I hear about the government, because it means we have freedom of speech.

For the parking spot I find at the far end of the parking lot, because it means I am capable of walking and I have been blessed with transportation.

For my huge heating bill, because it means I am warm.

For the lady behind me in church who sings off key, because it means I can hear.

For the pile of laundry and ironing, because it means I have clothes to wear.

For weariness and aching muscles at the end of the day, because it means I have been capable of working hard.

For the alarm that goes off in the early morning hours, because it means I am alive.

For too many emails, because it means I have friends who are thinking of me.

(Author Unknown)


“In everything give thanks….” I Thessalonians 5:18 (NASB)


Read more...

Why We Love Children

>> Friday, July 29, 2011

NUDITY
I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked. As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my five-year old shout from the back seat, “Mom, that lady isn’t wearing a seat belt.

OPINIONS
On the first day of school, a new student handed his teacher a note from his mother. The note read, “The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents.”

KETCHUP
A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the jar. During her struggle the phone rang, so she asked her four-year old daughter to answer the phone. “Mommy can’t come to the phone to talk to you right now. She’s hitting the bottle.”

MORE NUDITY
A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women’s locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, “What’s the matter with you? Haven’t you ever seen a little boy before?”

POLICE #1
While taking a routine vandalism report at a primary school, I was interrupted by a little girl about six years old. Looking up and down at my uniform, she asked, “Are you a cop?” “Yes,” I answered and continued writing the report. “My mother said if I ever needed help I should ask the police. Is that right?” “Yes, that’s right,” I told her. “Well then,” she said as she extended her foot toward me, “would you please tie my shoe?”

POLICE #2
It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of the station. As I gathered my equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake, was barking and I saw a little boy staring in at me. “Is that a dog you got back there?” he asked. “It sure is,” I replied. Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the van. Finally he asked, “What’d he do?”

ELDERLY
While working for an organization that delivers lunches to the elderly, I used to take my four-year old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs. One day I found her staring at some false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, “The tooth fairy will never believe this.”

DRESS UP
A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, “Daddy, you shouldn’t wear that suit.” “And why not, darling?” “You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning.”

DEATH
While walking along the pavement in front of his church, our minister heard the intoning of a prayer that nearly made his collar wilt. Apparently his five-year old son and his playmates had found a dead robin. Feeling that proper burial should be performed, they had secured a small box and cotton wadding, the dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased. The minister’s son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers and with sonorous dignity intoned his version of what he thought his father always said: “Glory be unto the Faaather, and unto the Sonnn, and into the hole he goooes.”

SCHOOL
A little girl had just finished her first week of school. “I’m just wasting my time,” she said to her mother. “I can’t read, I can’t write, and they won’t let me talk.”

BIBLE
A little boy opened the big family Bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages. “Mama, look what I found,” the boy called out. “What have you got there, dear?” With astonishment in the young boy’s voice, he answered,” I think it’s Adams’s underwear.”

(Author Unknown)


Read more...

Reflections from the Seat of a Tractor

>> Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight and bull-strong.

Keep skunks and bankers at a distance.

Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.

A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor.

Words that soak into your ears are whispered ... not yelled.

Meanness don't just happen overnight.

Forgive your enemies; it messes up their heads.

Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you.

It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge.

You cannot unsay a cruel word.

Every path has a few puddles.

When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.

The best sermons are lived, not preached.

Most of the stuff people worry about, ain't never gonna happen anyway.

Don't judge folks by their relatives.

Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.

Live a good and honorable life, then when you get older and think back, you'll enjoy it a second time.

Don't interfere with somethin' that ain't bothering you none.

Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.

If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.

Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got.

The biggest troublemaker you'll probably ever have to deal with, watches you from the mirror every mornin'.

Always drink upstream from the herd.

Good judgment comes from experience, and a lotta that comes from bad judgment.

Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it back in.

If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around.

Live simply, love generously, care deeply, speak kindly, and leave the rest to God.

“So now you can pick out what's true and fair, find all the good trails!Lady Wisdom will be your close friend, and Brother Knowledge your pleasant companion. good sense will scout ahead for danger, insight will keep an eye out for you. They'll keep you from making wrong turns, or following the bad directions of those who are lost themselves and can't tell a trail from a tumbleweed,” Proverbs 2:9-13 (MSG)



Read more...

Daily Bank Account

>> Monday, July 25, 2011

A 92-year-old, petite, well-poised and proud man, who is fully dressed each morning by eight o'clock, with his hair fashionably combed and shaved perfectly, even though he is legally blind, moved to a nursing home today. His wife of 70 years recently passed away, making the move necessary.

After many hours of waiting patiently in the lobby of the nursing home, he smiled sweetly when told his room was ready. As he maneuvered his walker to the elevator, I provided a visual description of his tiny room, including the eyelet sheets that had been hung on his window.

“I love it,” he stated with the enthusiasm of an eight-year-old having just been presented with a new puppy.

“Mr. Jones, you haven't seen the room; just wait.”

 “That doesn't have anything to do with it,” he replied. “Happiness is something you decide on ahead of time. Whether I like my room or not doesn't depend on how the furniture is arranged ... it's how I arrange my mind. I already decided to love it. It's a decision I make every morning when I wake up. I have a choice; I can spend the day in bed recounting the difficulty I have with the parts of my body that no longer work, or get out of bed and be thankful for the ones that do.

Each day is a gift, and as long as my eyes open, I'll focus on the new day and all the happy memories I've stored away ... just for this time in my life. Old age is like a bank account. You withdraw from what you've put in. So, my advice to you would be to deposit a lot of happiness in the bank account of memories! Thank you for your part in filling my Memory Bank. I am still depositing.”

Remember the five simple rules to be happy:
1. Free your heart from hatred.
2. Free your mind from worries.
3. Live simply.
4. Give more.
5. Expect less.

Have a nice day, unless you already have other plans.

(Author Unknown)

Be cheerful no matter what; pray all the time; thank God no matter what happens. This is the way God wants you who belong to Christ Jesus to live.”
I Thess. 5:16-18 (MSG)


Read more...

Learning to Listen

>> Sunday, July 24, 2011

We all know what it's like to get that phone call in the middle of the night. This night was no different. Jerking up to the ringing summons, I focused on the red, illuminated numbers of my clock. Midnight. Panicky thoughts filled my sleep-dazed mind as I grabbed the receiver.

"Hello?" My heart pounded, I gripped the phone tighter and eyed my husband, who was now turning to face my side of the bed.

"Mama?" The voice answered. I could hardly hear the whisper over the static. But my thoughts immediately went to my daughter. When the desperate sound of a young crying voice became clear on the line, I grabbed for my husband and squeezed his wrist.

"Mama, I know it's late. But don't ... don't say anything until I finish. And before you ask, yes I've been drinking. I nearly ran off the road a few miles back and...”

I drew in a sharp, shallow breath, released my husband and pressed my hand against my forehead. Sleep still fogged my mind, and I attempted to fight back the panic. Something wasn't right.

"...And I got so scared. All I could think of was how hurt you would be if a policeman came to your door and said I'd been killed. I want ... to come home. I know running away was wrong. I know you've been worried sick. I should have called you days ago but I was afraid ... afraid ..."

Sobs of deep-felt emotion flowed from the receiver and poured into my heart. Immediately I pictured my daughter's face in my mind, and my fogged senses seemed to clear, "I think ---"

"No! Please let me finish! Please!" She pleaded, not so much in anger, but in desperation. I paused and tried to think what to say.  Before I could go on, she continued. "I'm pregnant, Mama. I know I shouldn't be drinking now ... especially now, but I'm scared, Mama. So scared!"

The voice broke again, and I bit into my lip, feeling my own eyes fill with moisture. I looked up at my husband, who sat silently mouthing, "Who is it?" I shook my head and when I didn't answer, he jumped up and left the room, returning seconds later with a portable phone held to his ear. She must have heard the click in the line because she asked, "Are you still there? Please don't hang up on me! I need you. I feel so alone."

I clutched the phone and stared at my husband, seeking guidance. "I'm here, I wouldn't hang up," I said.

"I should have told you, Mama. I know I should have told you. But, when we talk, you just keep telling me what I should do. You read all those pamphlets on how to talk about sex and all, but all you do is talk. You don't listen to me. You never let me tell you how I feel. It’s as if my feelings aren't important. Because you're my mother you think you have all the answers. But sometimes I don't need answers. I just want someone to listen."

I swallowed the lump in my throat and stared at the how-to-talk-to-your-kids pamphlets scattered on my nightstand. "I'm listening," I whispered.

"You know, back there on the road after I got the car under control, I started thinking about the baby and taking care of it. Then I saw this phone booth and it was as if I could hear you
preaching to me about how people shouldn't drink and drive. So I called a taxi. I want to come home."

"That's good honey," I said, relief filling my chest. My husband came closer, sat down beside me and laced his fingers through mine.

"But you know, I think I can drive now."

"No!" I snapped. My muscles stiffened and I tightened the clasp on my husband's hand. "Please, wait for the taxi. Don't hang up on me until the taxi gets there."

"I just want to come home, Mama."

"I know. But do this for your mama. Wait for the taxi, please."

I listened to the silence, fearing. When I didn't hear her answer, I bit into my lip and closed my eyes. Somehow I had to stop her from driving. "There's the taxi, now." Only when I heard someone in the background asking about a Yellow Cab did I feel my tension easing.

"I'm coming home, Mama." There was a click, and the phone went silent. Moving from the bed, tears forming in my eyes, I walked out into the hall and went to stand in my 16 year old daughter's room.  My husband came from behind, wrapped his arms around me and rested his chin on the top of my head.

I wiped the tears from my cheeks. "We have to learn to listen," I said to him. He studied me for a second, and then asked, "Do you think she'll ever know she dialed the wrong number?"

I looked at our sleeping daughter, then back at him. "Maybe it wasn't such a wrong number."

"Mom, Dad, what are you doing?" The muffled voice came from under the covers. I walked over to my daughter, who now sat up staring into the darkness. "We're practicing," I answered. "Practicing what?" she mumbled and lay back on the mattress, but her eyes already closed in slumber.

"Listening," I whispered and brushed a hand over her cheek.
 
 (Author Unknown)


“Let the wise listen and add to their learning, and let the discerning get guidance.” Proverbs 1:5 (NIV)


Read more...

A Public Service Announcement

>> Friday, July 22, 2011

On the first day, God created the dog and said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past.  For this, I will give you a life span of twenty
years."

The dog said, "That's a long time to be barking.  How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?"

So God agreed......

On the second day, God created the monkey and said, "Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh.  For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span."

The monkey said, "Monkey tricks for twenty years?  That's a pretty long time to perform.  How about I give you back ten like the dog did?"

And God agreed......

On the third day, God created the cow and said, "You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family.  For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years."

The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years.  How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?"

And God agreed … again......

 On the fourth day, God created humans and said, "Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your
life.  For this, I'll give you twenty years."

But the human said, "Only twenty years?  Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back;
that makes eighty, okay?"

"Okay," said God.  "You asked for it."

So that is why for our first twenty years, we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves.  For the next forty years, we slave in the sun to support our family.  For the next ten years, we do
monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren.  And for the last ten years, we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.

Life has now been explained to you. There is no need to thank me for this valuable information.  I'm doing it as a public service announcement.

 (Author Unknown)


Read more...

Fifth Grade Assignment

>> Wednesday, July 20, 2011

A fifth grade teacher in a Christian school asked her class to look at TV commercials and see if they could use them in 20 ways to communicate about God. Here are some of the results.

God is like
BAYER ASPIRIN
He works miracles.



God is like
A FORD
He’s got a better idea.

God is like
COKE
He’s the real thing.

God is like
HALLMARK CARDS
He cares enough to send His very best.

God is like
TIDE
He gets the stains out others leave behind.

God is like
GENERAL ELECTRIC
He brings good things to life.

God is like
WALMART
He has everything.

God is like
ALKA-SELTZER
Try Him, you’ll like Him.

God is like
SCOTCH TAPE
You can’t see Him, but you know He’s there.

God is like
DELTA
He’s ready when you are.

God is like
ALLSTATE
You’re in good hands with Him.

God is like
VO-5 HAIR SPRAY
He holds through all kinds of weather.

God is like
DIAL SOAP
Aren’t you glad you have Him? Don’t you wish everybody did?

God is like
THE U. S. POST OFFICE
Neither rain, nor snow, nor sleet, nor ice will keep Him from His appointed destination.

God is like
CHEVROLET
The heartbeat of America.

God is like
MAXWELL HOUSE
Good to the very last drop.

God is like
BOUNTY
He is the quicker picker upper … can handle the tough jobs …and He won’t fall apart on you.

 God is like
THE ENERGIZER BUNNY
He keeps going and going and going.

(Author Unknown)


“For a child has been born—for us!
the gift of a son—for us!
He'll take over
the running of the world.
His names will be: Amazing Counselor,
Strong God,
Eternal Father,
Prince of Wholeness.” Isaiah 9:6 (MSG)


Read more...

New Version of "Footprints"

>> Monday, July 18, 2011

Imagine you and Jesus are walking down the beach together. For much of the way, His footprints go along steadily, consistently, rarely varying the pace. But your footprints are a disorganized stream of zigzags, starts, stops, turnarounds, circles, departures and returns. For much of the way, it seems to go like this, but gradually your footprints come more in line with the Lord’s, soon paralleling His consistently.

You and Jesus are walking as true friends.

This seems perfect, but an interesting thing happens: your footprints that once etched the sand next to Jesus are now walking precisely in His steps. Inside His larger footprints are your smaller ones, you and Jesus are becoming one. This goes on for many miles, but gradually you notice another change. The footprints inside the large footprints seem to grown larger.

Eventually they disappear altogether. There is only one set of footprints.

This goes on for a long time, but suddenly the second set of footprints is back. This time it seems even worse. Zigzags all over the place. Stops. Starts. Gashes in the sand. A veritable mess of prints.

You are amazed and shocked. Your dream ends. Now you pray, “Lord, I understand the first scene with zigzags and fits. I was a new Christian; I was just learning. But You walked on through the storm and helped me learn to walk with You.”

 “That is correct.”

 “And when the smaller footprints were inside of Yours, I was actually learning to walk in Your steps, following You very closely.”

“Very good. You have understood everything so far.”

“When the smaller footprints grew and filled in Yours, I suppose that I was becoming like You in every way.”

“Precisely.”

“So Lord, was there a regression or something? The footprints separated and this time it was worse than at first.”

There was a pause as the Lord answered, with a smile in His voice.

“You didn’t know? It was then that we danced.”

(Author Unknown)


“For everything there is a season,
a time for every activity under heaven.
A time to be born and a time to die.
A time to plant and a time to harvest.
A time to kill and a time to heal.
A time to tear down and a time to build up.
A time to cry and a time to laugh.
A time to grieve and a time to dance.”


Read more...

  © Blogger template Simple n' Sweet by Ourblogtemplates.com 2009 * © customized by Mari @ Free2Bedesigns.com/

Back to TOP