Fear Plugs Addendum

The time for terror had arrived. My intestines let me know they didn’t like this idea. Tears threatened. My heart rate accelerated. And we hadn’t even reached the elevator to take us to the ground floor so we could walk to the beach.

Our friends, Phil and Anita, and my husband, John, were accompanying me on this journey. I knew John understood the depth of my fear. It was difficult to make others realize the battle within me.

Their talk buzzed over my head. My focus was on taking the next step…and the next one.

And then there it was…wave after wave rolling in. I could hear my heart beating in my ears…along with the roar. The tears flowed. I was so tired of this. I stopped walking and stood facing the ocean.

“I need you to pray.”

And so the prayers began and were completed. Yet still I stood…facing my dreaded foe. I was ready to stand there for hours…awaiting the calm. Gradually my heart rate slowed and the tears dried up. I raised my head and stared at the restless movement. No clenching in my gut.

“Ok, we can walk now.”

Any time I have ever been to the beach, my spot in the line of people walking along the water’s edge was the furthest away from the ocean. No logic there. But it gave me a buffer. Yet here I was, walking the closest to the water…and actually carrying on a conversation. My brain was functioning again. When we turned and headed back, I remained on the side next to the water.

No tears.  No pounding heart.  But for me the test would be the next time.

I’m delighted to say I returned to the beach with a smile on my face.  Tears of gratitude…not fear…rolled down my cheeks. The raging tumult within me had been stilled.

“He calmed the storm to a whisper and stilled the waves. What a blessing was that stillness…” Psalm 107:29-30 (NLT)

Read more...

A Smile Came to Stay

The following blog is written by my husband, John, but he captures the feelings for both of us.

A few years ago we built a new house. One of the important things we wanted was a guest wing where someone in need could come and find refuge for a while. We built that wing and various friends and family slept there, but a few years passed before it could be used for that purpose.

Then one day we had the blessing of a friend who was in need. She didn’t want to be a bother, but needed a place to stay for a few weeks while her condo was being readied.

 

So a smile came to live with us for a while

The smile was a little tarnished and cracked by life and it was small but it remained here with us. The smile spent time with us sitting in the TV room watching the Olympics together. We talked and laughed and the smile began to relax. Days passed. Cookies were made and brownies consumed in amazing quantities. The smile got bigger.

The smile was going through some tough times, but talked little about her emotions. We hurt for her but could only offer our hugs and company. We prayed for her every day that she would find peace and comfort. 

As the days passed we laughed more and more and came to know what a kind and loving person this smile was. She was moving into our hearts as well as our home.

Then came the day when her place was almost ready to move into. My wife and I talked about what a hole it would leave in our hearts when the smile moved out.

Well the day came and the smile was ready to leave but an amazing thing happened. She left but the smile stayed in our hearts.

Now we understood why those years ago as we designed our new house that guest wing was so important to us… you see in both of our lives we had need of a refuge at one time and we could now pay it forward.

And we learned that the smile helped us as much as we helped her.

Thank You smile. We will always love you.

Read more...

A Pleasing Fragrance

As I opened the mailbox, a lovely fragrance wafted out. And then I spied the package. Without a doubt, I knew what it contained…bath salts…a gift from my daughter. When those salts are dissolved in the bath water, the whole bathroom is filled with a pleasing aroma. And I get to choose…lavender…warming balsam fir…tranquil chamomile.

 

Not all odors are wonderful.

My husband and I used to own a business located in the basement of a dental office. At lunchtime, my husband would heat some brussel sprouts in the microwave. He discontinued that practice when the assistant from upstairs complained that it smelled like someone farted in their waiting room.

What kind of scent do you exude?

I’m not talking about body odor…although that can sometimes be an issue. I’m referring to the fragrance of your life. Does the essence of your being radiate a pleasant ambiance? Or do people avoid you?

“Everywhere we go, people breathe in the exquisite fragrance. Because of Christ, we give off a sweet scent rising to God…” 2 Corinthians 2:14 (MSG)

Read more...

Chicken or Eagle

A folktale handed down through the years is of an Indian who found an eagle’s egg. Unable to find the nest it came from, he slipped the egg in the nest of a prairie chicken. When the eggs hatched, out came several chickens and one eagle.

But it didn’t know it was an eagle.

So it scratched in the dirt, pecked for seeds and fluttered its wings to fly a few feet above the ground. Occasionally it would raise its head, spot an eagle soaring high in the sky and wonder what that would feel like.

But it was a chicken, so it would lower its head and return to pecking in the dirt…never delighting in that glorious feeling.

I grew up in a chicken pen.

Due to a combination of older age, too many children and religion, my mother filled my head with rules and judgments that kept me scratching in the dirt and eating seeds. At school I would see a group of children…laughing and playing together…and wonder what that would feel like.

But I was an obedient daughter and a Christian, so I would sit alone. It was my lot in life to stay true to God. There would be no soaring for me.

How grateful I am for the people in my life that saw my eagle’s wings and asked questions about why I wasn’t using them. What a surprise and delight to discover God had endowed me with the capability to soar.

“But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.” Isaiah 40:31 (NLT)

Read more...