The Art of Losing Weight

Quite the title.  Does that make me the expert?  No.  I can only talk to what works for me.  

I grew up being told to clean my plate to save all those starving children in China.  By sixth grade I weighed 140 pounds.  Early marriage…three children…still cleaning my plate and telling them to.  

Then I faced nine years being single.  That’s when I went through two years of discarding everything I had been taught and picking for myself what I chose to believe.  I decided I wasn’t responsible for those starving children.  My decision affected my children because I stopped eating at night.  I would come home from work, change my clothes and go for a seven-mile walk.  It was their job to cook, eat and clean up before I got home.  

Over two years I lost 100 pounds.  I stopped eating fried foods, using salt and cut back on caffeine.  

Life happened.  I re-married.  He wanted me to eat dinner with him.  It caused such strain in our marriage, we went to counseling.  The skinny counselor said, “So you are so stubborn you won’t sit down and eat dinner with your husband?”  I said, “I will gladly sit down while he eats.”  Counselor: “You can just eat a salad or something.”  Me: “Would you tell an alcoholic to take just one drink?”  

It didn’t go well.  

After 20 pounds of weight gain, I told my husband, “I am not willing to gain weight for you.”  We worked it out.  

Over the last few years, my weight has crept up by 40 pounds.  My focus was elsewhere, such as my husband’s cancer and then his death.  Choosing to eat correctly was at the bottom of the list.  But now I’m back and making better choices.  I’m 20 pounds down to my 40-pound weight loss goal.  

Here is my plan that works for me.  Eat less.  Simple but not easy.  

When I was dating my husband, he would take me out to eat.  I always left a little of everything on my plate.  One day he called me on it.  

“There are reasons for that.  I had to get past the fact I was wasting money.  My health has to be more important.  If I leave a little of each thing, then I can’t ask for seconds.  And when I leave the restaurant, I don’t feel stuffed.”  

There are other ways I work around weight loss.  I rarely go to a potluck or buffet.  I’m a foodaholic.  Can’t take that first bite.  

For 40 years, I’ve tried to not eat after 4:00 pm.  I find it ironic that now that seems to be the latest weight loss craze.  I try to consume food between 8:00 am and 4:00 pm.  A side effect of that choice is a very restful sleep.  My body is not working on digesting food.  I lay down, sleep and get up.  (Just another little tidbit for those who want to sleep through the night.  I don’t partake of liquids after 6:00 pm.)  

I really don’t care for rice or pasta.  But I do like bread and potatoes.  If I deprive myself of them, then my desire for them increases to the point that I overindulge.  So, I work bread and potatoes into my meals each week.  Each day I write down what I have consumed, when I consume it.  That way I can see at a glance if I need protein or maybe some fruit.  Helps keep me on track.  

Friday is my day to eat what I want without guilt.  I’ve used this trick for years.  If I’m wanting a cookie (or two or three) on Tuesday, I tell myself I can have them on Friday.  If I feel I’m depriving me, I rebound and eat everything in sight.  

I really don’t believe in weight-loss programs.  They provide the packaged food; you eat what they say, and you lose the weight.  Then you are on your own, cooking and eating what you buy or fix.  You have not been taught how to eat correctly.  You are right back where you were before you spent all that money.  

I avoid anything with the word “diet” on it.  My consumption of diet food and drink did not result in weight loss.  It had the opposite effect.  I came to the conclusion that the “diet” chemical caused cravings.  Like I say, I’m not the expert. That’s what happened for me.  

Exercise is also a part of the plan.  But I don’t believe you have to expend a lot of money or time to keep healthy.  I am a member of a gym and have been for years.  At first it was very intimidating to be in there with the studs and models.  But I’m going there for my health, so have learned to ignore them.  I spent some time with a trainer, and he gave me exercises I can do at home.  So mostly I walk on the treadmill…five days a week.  And for me, I do it first thing in the day.  If I say I’ll do it later, it never happens.  

All I can say is just be aware of what you are doing to sabotage your weight loss.  It may be so subtle you’ve never realized it.  And expect those friends who help with the sabotage…who offer you cake or donuts.  How badly do you want to lose weight?  You may have to offend someone.  

As people have begun to notice my recent weight loss, they ask “What are you doing to lose weight?”  My reply is usually, “Eating less”.  But that’s not truly helpful.  So, I’ve tried to express some beneficial thoughts in this blog.  

Even if you only change one thing at a time, over the long haul you will see results.  I believe the slower you take it off, the more likely you are to succeed.  The outcome is worth it.