Blessed Are the Cracked

>> Friday, September 2, 2011

  1. Blessed are the cracked, for they let in the light.

  1. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn’t.

  1. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

  1. You’re just jealous because the voices only talk to me.

  1. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

  1. I’m not a complete idiot … some parts are just missing.

  1. NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning medicine.

  1. God must love stupid people; He made so many.

  1. The gene pool could use a little Chlorine.

  1. Ever stop to think, and then forget to start again?

  1. Being “over the hill” is much better than being under it.

  1. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.

  1. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park somewhere else.

  1. They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.

  1. A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the memory.

  1. The trouble with life is there’s no background music.

  1. The original point and click interface was a Smith & Wesson.

(Author Unknown)


Joanne Sher September 2, 2011 at 7:48 AM  

Oooooh my. Haven't laughed this hard in a LONG time!

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